Scholars raise voice against dowry

Scholars raise voice against dowry

People urged in a resolution to boycott attending the un-Islamic marriage parties.

Dowry and Reception day dinner forced on bride’s parents is illegitimate.

Scholars at Jeddah Seminar _ 20th July 2011

Scholars belonging to various schools of thought gathered on one stage and declared unanimously that the system of dowry prevailing in India, Pakistan and Bangladesh is not Islamic. It is corrupt, therefore, illegitimate. Presided over by Mr. Ahmeduddin Owaisi, organized by Socioreforms Society of Jeddah on 20th July, 2011 at Asian Delight Restaurant, Jeddah will be remembered by many with the incident that the electricity broke down before the start of the prog. People sat in severely hot and humid hall for two hours, sweating heavily, still did not move from the seats until the last speaker.
A resolution was signed by the scholars and audience both saying “The wedding parties will be boycotted where there will be dowry or wedding day dinner if given by the bride’s guardians”.

Aleem Khan Falaki who presented the resolution said in his opening speech that the dowry and the Reception day’s dinner is allowed in Islam if spent by the bride-groom. This system has been reversed, the bride’s parents are compelled to spend, therefore it is not legitimate in Islam. Highlighting the worst consequences, he said the people are crushed financially due to this extravagance. As a result there is alarming Increase in the rate of divorces, prostitution, immoral activities among the youths, girls’ marrying to unmatched men without parents permission, court cases of strained relations etc. The witchcraft or satanic magic holders are exploiting the society by luring them to make the grooms slave to the bride. Most important damage is that the inheritance rules in Islam which Quran describes as Line of Control are spoiled due to the dowry system. Once the girls are paid lot of dowry they are deprived of the inheritance of the father. On the other hand the sons too are deprived of the money which they could use to start the business, but they are bound to search odd jobs as the parents are compelled to spend whole saving for the daughters’ marriages.
He said the dowry and wedding dinner is a bribe, Israaf (extravagance, a need that is not genuine but created for the sake of pomp, show off for the sake of maintaining the status in the society), reversing of Quranic verses (Quran defines the “man” as who spends from his pocket on women but due to the dowry system the women have become “man” as they are spending from their pocket to buy the man), social blackmail and male prostitution (the price of the groom is fixed on the basis of the qualification, earning, family status etc, and vice versa if the woman Is less beautiful or less educated or widow or divorcee, she has to pay more to the groom), therefore the dowry is Haraam. He presented 2-point Resolution

  • Boycott the dowry ridden marriages and let the inviters feel guilty
  • Boycott the wedding day dinner if given by the parents of the girl, this type of dinner is against Sunnah.

All the scholars overwhelmingly supported the resolution in the light of Quran and Hadees.

Maulana Mohammed Banayeem, a well known Khateeb and scholar of Jameeatul Ulema-Hind based in Jeddah said the dowry system has become a cancer, Mere admonitions or advises will not effect, it needs operation, the boycott is must. He quoted the Prophet’s saying “make the Nikah (marriage act) so much easy that the adultery becomes difficult” but today those who are spending a lot on the wedding day dinner and dowry are helping the adultery to become easy.

Maulana Fazlurrahman from Pakistan’s Jamaat Ahle-Hadees said that the Prophet had instructed to make the criteria of piousness instead of money, beauty etc in the selection of boy or girl. Otherwise Allah imposes fitna and fasaad . Today whole world is engulfed in the punishment of Fitna. Every act which is not on the method of the prophet is a mutiny against Islam. When no government can tolerate any mutineer, how Allah will tolerate any mutiny against him? He supported the resolution on the basis of pomp and show off.

Sheikh Hidayat Sheikh Hamed, well known scholar and orator of Shia community said “people make excuse of the dowry items given to the Prophet’s daughter Fatima peace be upon her”. He said it is a biggest lie. All scholars of Sunni and Shia religions agree that the dowry purchased was from the money given by Ali peace be upon him as Mehr. He said dowry is defined as that thing which is from Man’s money, not woman’s otherwise it is illegitimate.

Well known scholar of South India’s biggest and oldest Islamic university “Jama Nizamia” Maulana Abdul Qadeer Tahir Qadri said the practice of dowry or eating on the expense of girl’s parents’ expense is an act of begging. Begging is illegitimate in Islam. He quoted the Prophet’s saying that “Giver’s hand is better than takers hand”. Whether it is given with consent in the name of the system or it is demanded, in both cases the taker is lower and giver is better and higher. It is against the self diginity and insult to the man’s pride of manlihood.

Sheikh Arshad Basheer Madani, a well known ETV Urdu scholar from Medina University and MBA from England strongly supported the resolution and said the horrible damages to the society due to the dowry system are just uncountable. This has indulged the whole community in many morally corrupt activities. He showed how the Government of India too has introduced strict laws to curb this but, since the people do not hesitate to violate the Prophet’s own instructions, how can they abide by the Government laws? He presented the statistics of feticide, infanticide, dowry deaths, harassments and court cases etc and proved that the dowry has scattered an imbalance in the society.

Chairman Mr. Ahmeduddin Owaisi hailed the anti-dowry campaign and assured that AIMIM chief Asaduddin Owaisi is taking up this campaign to every locality. He said that the dowry, as said by the scholars, is totally unIslamic, and until a few years ago there was neither such dowry problem nor there were the compulsions of lavishly dinners. The excess of money is generating the extravagance. He supported the resolution and appealed to everyone to support to eradicate the dowry and wedding day dinner from the society.

In the conclusion over 200 men and 50 women pledged to boycott the dowry and dinners by raising hands and signed the pledge.

On the vote of thanks by Dr. Haroon Sayeed and Saleem Farooqi, the successful function came to an end.

21 comments on “Scholars raise voice against dowry”

  1. shehbaz Reply

    ASAK Dear Aleem sahab,
    MashaAllah great work, I have no words to express my feelings about your work or the cause you are working for. Applaud! I give you a standing ovation. I have also watched your talk on the topic of “Economy of Indian Muslims” which is really interesting, educating and eye opening to many muslims. JazakAllah khair.
    I request you to make more videos like this one and post on youtube.
    Shehbaz
    NYC

    • Abid Reply

      Let me play the devil’s advocate on this list where evoyrene seems to be agreed that dowry is evil. Maybe my moral compass is screwed up, but I see marriage as contract between two people, insofar as it has legal sanction (otherwise the issue is does not arise). I really dont see why the government should be circumscribing the right of parties to whatever contract they fell like. After in the US, people do have pre-nups. It is high time we dropped some rose-tinted view of marriage. People choose the best possible spouse they can get (assortative mating). That is afact of nature. Do you find it all surprising that rich and succesful mean around the world end up with beautiful wive(s)? In India’s peculiar arranged marriage dynamic assortative mating find its expression in the form of dowry.BTW, there were many communities in India which did not have dowary 50 years back and many in fact had bride price (reverse dowry). Bride price was a recognition that the woman was an economic resource (typically in working class families). Many of these communties have seen a reversal from bride-price to dowry. Several factors have pushed women from these families out of the workforce. The questuion of dowary is complicated and beyong the scope of this comment. Acting sanctimonious is hardly constructive. As long as women seek stable families (hard0wired in their genes) and as long as men prefer to sow their seeds around, there will be a large number of women chasing few powerful, rich men. In different socities that chase will take different forms. Ley me state that i did not take dowry nor did anyone I know closely. I dont think I need to state this but I will cl;arify just in case. Bride burning or tortue or anything that is against the law should of course be dealt with strictly. I know that there is alaw against dowry, but I see that law as flawed and basically against the spirit ofn freedom of contract.

  2. Mir Sadat Ali Khan Reply

    Dear Aleem Khan

    ASAK,Good move appreciate your efforts to bring changes in our community.

    Regards

    Mir Sadat Ali Khan
    Chicago

    • Ola Reply

      a type of lung cancer, uullasy associated with men who have worked with asbestoswives have been known to contract it as well, after having to wash their husband’s work clothing with asbestos fibres in itmy dad used to work in ship engine rooms and the asbestos would be like snow in the air he would use a rag to cover his face (no safety equipment then) and the other boilermakers would laugh at him they are all dead now

    • Jeric Reply

      MichaelNo, the origin of dowry did not start off as a bribe. In fact dowry,”dahej” or “meher”(if I rmebmeer correctly) as it is colloquially, was an allowance provided by the parents when the daughter got married. This was not only cash, but also came with land, jewellry even servants. This allowance was just means to make the girls life comfortable in her husbands house. If you get an opportunity, watch an old Hindi movie called “Dahej”, starring Prithiviraj Kapoor, which exemplifies the negatives of the dowry system quite well. Over a period of time, this was institutionalised as a mandatory custom. I rmebmeer chatting with a programmer from AP at a social gathering and he casually mentioned that he took only “Rs. 8 lacs” in dowry. When the rest of us started berating him for this dastardly act, he retorted ” Well there are programmers from the US who take 1 crore in dowry”. And this from a guy who was making well over $100,000 in the US!!!

  3. Mubashir Reply

    Dear Br Falaki, copying a comment from another website where the above was posted:

    The issue of “halalah” or instantaneous divorce just by saying talaq, talaq, talaq should be the topic of the next seminar.

    I commend you for your efforts in removing bida practices from the Ummah

    • Aleem Khan Reply

      Asak.
      Thanks for this reply. There are many things on our
      agenda. We want to move step by step. Pls help us to gather a number of suppporters on dowry and wedding day’s dinner issue, then we will move ahead inshallah.
      Pls let us have your contact details and email id.
      Thanks

      Aleem Khan
      aleemfalki@yahoo.com

  4. Pareethu Bava Khan Reply

    It is a good and right step which require wide-spread awareness campaign and effective follow up.

  5. Imran Azam Reply

    Insha-Allah… May Allah guide us and help us to follow Religiously, I pledge that Insha-Allah i will not attend any marriage of this kind and will circulate this as much as possible. Also i Pray to Allah that we all follow the same including my Family and Friends.

  6. Mohammad Sayeeduddin Reply

    Masha Allah..
    Very Nobel Start .. in the right direction…May Allah Reward you.. I think we should repeat such programs in India.. in different cities and frequently .. till we get full media coverage..

    Subject very well covered…Jazakumullah..

      • Maria

        My teacher told us in our cdolhhiod not to take dowry and be like real men. Yes, but I cant compromise on the outer and inner beauty of a woman. Hee hehheh ehe………….. It is the stupidity of some girls parents, thinking that their girl is ugly , even if she is really ugly they use lot of money to get her married off to a guy in a good position or fall for abroad settled guys like dogs and fools. It is their mistake. They must know what the girls want. Also when the son is in a big position, the mother of the groom goes off proudly and starts making dowry demands, forgetting she is a woman. The future generation will see man giving dowry to get married, that’s fine , then we’ll see how people react.

    • Reko Reply

      It is a disease csuaed by inhaling asbestos. It has nothing to do with female sex issues however it is a slow death issue for those that ingested asbestos. The average life span is around 20 to 25 years.. Congress passed a law that a person exposed to asbestos has to file a clam before 15 years after exposure when it usually shows up after 15 years. Why greed money from the lobbyist keeping companies that knew for years but exposed there people to this death sentence so that they could maximize there profits. Many people and families are getting screwed because of Congresses greed.

    • Felix Reply

      Listen people. I have two peeersctivps of this so called “dowry” system. Decide yourself why it is still there in Indian social system.Girl’s perspective: If I am a working woman and I stand as equal to my man, what is the point of giving a dowry? But, what is the social status of my family if I get married to a man without dowry. We are nowhere poor (and friends nobody is poor according to their values and beliefs). And, what would people think if he is a “Man” or not if I don’t give dowry. I buy the man and he doesn’t complain later in my married life that he didn’t get benefit from my family. I’ll pay the dowry. After all it will support me only in my married life.Boy’s perspective: I am earning so much money and I am well qualified (though he is just one among the millions) I would lead my family, my wife, my children. After all I take care of her for the next 75 yrs more to come. Why don’t I take a little dowry after all it is for their daughter’s future only (It is one of the best ways to get rich very quickly) And, if I don’t take, they would think I am asking more favors from them because I didn’t take dowry later. Ask more now itself.My perspective: I say that dowry is just a token of small gift to the newly married couple for their future, no where it is perennial nor a life changing treasure. Those who cannot afford, you should never give. Those who understand this should never demand. After all, marriage is made for love not money!- Nath V.G.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>